there were many times today when i thought i caught the scent of strawberries drifting past me and i looked around every time.

i guess having somebody to miss means that you will miss them at some point.  haha.

but really, this isn't so bad.

today was good, as was yesterday, and the transition from yesterday into today was good too.  got like 2 hours or so of sleep.  woke up early to go check in with the dog i'm kinda taking care of for the weekend.  that dog and i were getting along fine the last time i saw him.  now he hates me.  i got bit, and therefore bled (not a lot).  i tried to use pretzels to plead my case with the dog, but he wouldn't have any of that.  well, he would have the pretzels, but it didn't seem to help our relationship much.  i had to use a pretzel to trick him into going outside.

later on when i visited him after work, things went better.  dog treats helped.  i didn't get bit.  i played around with him, chased him in circles around a chair.  there were still a lot of uneasy moments though, like the awkward silence + eye contact that can happen between people who are still a little unsure of each other.

and then i had an epic fail moment.  the passenger side rearview mirror on my car is currently hanging useless on the side of my car and i'm an idiot.  i think some duct tape will fix this though.  fix the mirror, not the idiot part.

but still, still... so much to be thankful for.

i was thinking of la dispute songs while pushing carts around in the snow (which btw is really difficult).  i stole the syncopation from a song or two of theirs to write some words in my head.  these words are sometimes called lyrics.

and then the storm reared it's horns in the darkness,

and bared it's teeth within the wailing of the wind.

a siren's song calls you to sleep among the black waves,

but i will die before i let them take you in.

yes i will try, though it may tear me limb from limb.

---------

we'll see.  i see a story of a ship in stormy seas there.

i need to get going on some homework before i fall asleep.  need to wake up earlier than a usual sunday so i can stop by the dog again.  really, i don't mind, i like helping out.  btw the dog's name is Dakota, but i don't think it's spelled that way.  this is why i didn't use his name until now, because i didn't want to do it wrong.  oh well.

please

dear God, please don't let me ever, ever take this girl for granted.

i would never want to mess things up.

i am really happy.

yes

today i wore my favorite thrice shirt.

today i wore my favorite thrice jacket.

i was planning on today being one of my favorite days.

my preparations were well placed.

i'm goin' steady with the coolest girl i know.

still not quite sure how i lucked out on this one.... but i'm happy.

really happy.

thanks

this is post #350.

is that significant?  i don't think it is.

it's currently 8:12am, and there's no way i'd usually be up writing at this hour.  my 7:45am class was cancelled today, but nobody knew about it until we were already sitting in the class, wondering/hoping if it was cancelled.  i think i might go get some more sleep shortly, we'll see.

i thought of something on the very chilly walk to class though.

it's only over the past year that i've been really starting to learn what love is.  and i definitely do not mean just bf/gf kind of love.

i've always been awkward around love, even the true, caring, friendship kind of love.  i don't know why.  but there's been a few good friends that have helped show me what it's like to love your friend truly as a brother or sister.  i appreciate that a lot.

thanks AJ, Taylor, Kelley, Nick.  you guys are first that come to mind.  it's not only your interactions with me that i've learned from, but just how you live with the people around you.

i've got to say, right now i'm probably the best i've ever been.

if nothing else, i'm at least the oldest i've ever been.

:)

good things

today was full of good things.

i got to share music i liked with my music listening class. (judgement day and thrice)

good meeting at JCS about the video. (they'll be paying steve and i soon)

subway for lunch

i got some homework accomplished.

dub trio is next month.   phew

i got a package from noellen in the mail. (loop pedal + kettle pops)

(i just realized i forgot to do something)

i rode with AJ to His House

i was at HH (suited up, yo)

found a $20 applebees gift card in my suit pocket

the pub

i rode back with Sarah.

the office, heroes, ice pirates

hug goodbye.

it was a really good day.

"hello" is a good time for a hug too.

i feel like i failed when i don't have something to say.  sometimes.  but i think that's ridiculous of me to think such things.

i didn't realize how much i wanted all of this.

i'm happier, despite all there is that could drag me down.

i think too much.   :)

candle burning

what would they all think if i didn't make it?

if i gave up now?

i made it really far...

this isn't my dream anymore, and it's hard to be motivated.

no, i can't give up though.  and i can do it.

i'm just getting burned out.

i need this spring break badly.

a week where i don't think of homework and school will be a blessed week indeed.

everything just feels....

RIGHT.