firstly, good news.
i think i found the next guitar i'm going to buy.
i think there's a good name to call this guitar somewhere in my head, but i can't pull it out. it's a Gibson Les Paul Double Cutaway style. no pickguard, 2 volume knobs for the pickups, one tone knob. looks pretty. i want to find one to try out first though. exciting. now i need to start setting some money aside. maybe in a year or so...the costco "holiday" party is saturday, i'm pretty excited to go. i'm bringing emo with me, because that's safe. nick didn't respond when i asked him if he wanted to go. i think that meant he was saying "i'm probably supposed to hang out with cory that weekend like i do every weekend so i'll have to say no but i won't directly say no" whatev. should be fun. i'm hoping to win a tv or a ps3. fingers crossed! :)
everybody at work is talking about the party, mostly just asking other people if they are going. last night after we were closed some one asked who i was taking with to the party. before i could answer some one else chimed in with "you're taking your girlfriend right?" and i had to fake chastise him for being so out of touch with my life. one of the managers heard i didn't have a girlfriend and he made a big deal about it, saying we need to find somebody for me. he suggested a lady who works there, because she's single (newly divorced). har har rigo. har har. and jen was telling me all about her wonderful friend who thought i was cute in a picture. jen would like nothing more than to get me a date with one of her good friends. she sounded pretty interesting though. older than me (you know how i roll, /sarcasm), works at the red cross, goes to mars hill, loves reading books, very "cultured," been to france for a while. sounds nice. i'm not considering it, just recording thoughts.
man, i really handled things badly a year ago. almost exactly a year ago. fractured two important, meaningful friendships. one broke completely. Jo won't even talk to me anymore, and i'm sorry. the other... well it's ok now, but i just regret how i handled it. so much to learn. i worry i missed out on something good. but you can't live life thinking that way. at least, you can't and be happy.
i usually walk with my head level or down when i leave school. today i walked looking up, and it made all the difference.
Last November was just... bad. Many mistakes were made all around. Many regrets. But, you're right. You can't constantly look at the past. There's no room for happiness in that; only disappointment.
ReplyDeleteI'm not calling the month bad. There was good in it. I learned, things about myself and about people. I don't regret learning, but sometimes the way you had to realize those things isn't ideal. It's just a month where everything happened all at once and I didn't handle it as well as I could have. There are solidly good memories from then, I wouldn't go back and change it. Just need to learn.
ReplyDelete